Tommy, Tommy, Tommy, I try so hard, but I just can’t seem to please you. Maybe if I make a few changes to the story line. First of all, lets forget about that homely plaid stuff, this is America boyo, so Richard has a solid red blanket on his lap, and his companion in the sleigh is his pretty wife (after all this is a family forum). OK, you want a cannon, that’s easy, Richard has a cannon under the blanket; he already told us this in a previous post, and I for one believe him, because I think he’s a trustworthy type of a guy, and on top of that, he won an award because of the fact. Now what else can I add that would really hold your interest, of course, I don't know how I didn't think of this earlier. Richard is utterly sloshed on that iodine tasting, brain rotting poison that some people refer to as scotch (Richard, please forgive me this bit of fiction, I'm just trying to stimulate the poor guy's imagination). That's right, my lionhearted friend is four sheets to the wind; and then what does he do? Yes, you guessed it, he reaches under the blanket, and pulls out his ............... laptop, (fooled ya, didn't I) and then begins to log in to the GBO BPMC forum, but his wife being the intelligent, vivacious (and perhaps more importantly, sober) lady that she is, takes the computer away from him, and says: Richard, you can't go on the forum in this condition, you will make a complete and utter ass of yourself, you will only babble, prattle, and bore with your abject, alchohol induced supercilliousness. Richard then thanked his wise wife for stopping him from making a fool of himself, and taking the reins, he directed the horses back in the direction of the Vermont B&B where they were staying. I think that it's possible that there may even be some fellows here that could reap some benefits from this fable. Oy vey, I almost forgot, you wanted to know if a cannon firng would make the sleigh rock and roll, teeter and totter, perchance even flip over. Well, the answer is no it wouldn't, and if you'd read a few books, you might know this without having to witness it. In any case, we couldn't find out on this fine winter evening in Vermont, because Ballantine's worst had a negative affect on the cannon, and our protagonist couldn't get it to function; you know how that goes, dontcha? The End.
