finisher, I totally agree. I'll work on making my family more tolerant towards everybody. You can start on the Mexican mafia or the Black Panthers! gypsyman
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I'ts not about tolerance, Gypsyman. I agree that no one should have to tolerate crime. What I'm talking about is projection of attitude.
Don't know about Black Panthers specifically. but I've crossed passed with some pretty militant types. In the concrete trade, I've actually worked with a number of these M Mafia types. Yes, many of them do have regular jobs believe it or not.
I know that many of you find it hard to believe, but I have never had the kind of racial problems that many here describe. And I've lived in some real rough neighborhoods. Although, I'm not blond haired and blue eyed, but I'm much more fair than most and definitely not some Poncho Villa and goatee sportin' "cue ball" riddled with jail house tats either.
I just know how to get along with people of all sorts. It wasn't always this way. I had to learn through painful lessons and help from wise people how not to
project my emotions through practicing controlled body language and voice tone.
I had buddies in the Navy that would leave the ship in cowboy hats and "excrement kickers" talking all kinds of good 'ol American values to people in foreign countries and then they'd wonder why they end up getting rolled up and wheeled back to the ship looking like a bloody mess.
Coming from a long line of sailors and marines I was wised up in how to travel as incognito as I could.
When you grow up on the streets, you have to learn to read people and be aware of how you project yourself to others. And one can come across friendly and open minded without appearing weak or aggressive. This skill would apply well to some of the situations that Anna described.
The first thing I noticed about people when I moved to Medford was that everyone would stare at me suspiciously, and then in almost a state of confusion, when I opened my mouth and they heard that I spoke English (and in many cases, better than they).
One of my co workers told me that he didn't know what to make of me when we first met; long dark hair, pony tail; not as dark as one of the local natives but similar in appearance (must be the Apache in me Anna); and then the red beard (Scottish, I'm told) combined with speaking English really threw him off.
I can tell you that criminals that mean you harm enjoy having this power over people, particularly in the situations that Anna described. And they can pick up on your suspicion and pre judgement right away. We have all kinds of vendors come to our neighborhoods.
Converse with them (if you can) and turn it around on them by pretending your genuinely interested in them and their "legitimate" business.
Give them the impression that you know ALL of your neighbors by name and that they know you. Tell them what a good place it is and how Mr. Jones two houses down caught a burglar last week and worked him over before the police showed up. And always, always smile
while looking them directly in the eyes without projecting judgement.
But don't try this if your prejudice and pre judgement is rooted so deep that you cannot control how you project yourself. Because they will see right through you and
it will encourage them more than deter them.I'm not a criminal, but I know the look and the signs of pre judgement quite well. I never call anyone on it because they'll always deny it. But I just keep smiling because they have no idea what to make of me, but I've got their number. It's not their faults really, just need to do a little more living outside of the rural bubble.
What Anna is talking about is happening in many other places as well, and not just along the border states. Like it or not, that is the result of capitalism, free enterprise, and corporate development catching up with the rest of America. I mean hey, you can only rape and pillage so far until you run out of room.
Street smart people can sense fear and judgement and use it against you if you give them that power.
It's all about people skills, the strength diversity of which is difficult to come by when rural America is the main extent of ones experience. But it's not impossible. Just takes an open mind and subtle observational skills.
I'll let you know how I do with the Black Panthers, Gypsy
. And maybe I'll pay a visit to the Aryan Brotherhood and the Wah Chings while I'm at it. Had some fun times with ALL those clowns.