Author Topic: Runner at the nursing home.  (Read 538 times)

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Offline Sourdough

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Runner at the nursing home.
« on: March 14, 2013, 04:12:23 PM »
My Dad is in a nursing home.  He keeps falling and Mom can not get him up, so we (My brothers, myself, and Mom) decided it was best he go to the nursing home.  Dad has Alzheimers and does not know where he is most of the time.  While my wife, son, and myself were visiting in December during vacation, we had a funny incident happen.  As we were leaving an old woman was sitting in the lobby.  She started moving towards the door with her wheel chair.  My wife told my Mom not to enter the code to open the door,  Mom did not hear her, and pushed the code.  the old woman made a break for the open door.  My son Sky grabbed the handles on her wheel chair and held her stationary.  It was sort of funny watching her using her feet to try and propel that wheel chair out the door.  Her feet were just going like mad.  My wife went back to the desk to get a nurse, while Sky held the wheel chair.  One of the employees came in at that time and stepped in front of the Wheel chair.  She called the woman by name and asked where she was heading.  Sky pushed down on the handles and spun the wheel chair around.  He then passed it to the employee.  The old lady was furious, she did not make it out the door.

Two nights later as we left, I held the doors open for an elderly couple coming in.  I did not know holding the doors open would set off an alarm.  As we were walking to the car an employee came out asking if we had one of their residents.  My wife being the joker as usual pointed to my Mom and Me saying "Yes, two runners".  The employee stopped Mom and I then realized the wife was joking.  My Mom got a bit mad, I thought it was funny.  The wife was in hot water for the rest of the evening.
Where is old Joe when we really need him?  Alaska Independence    Calling Illegal Immigrants "Undocumented Aliens" is like calling Drug Dealers "Unlicensed Pharmacists"
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Offline Ranger99

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2013, 04:24:49 PM »
sorry to hear about your pop.
my mom worked at a nursing home
and an assisted living for a number
of years and had to deal with a good
number of folks afflicted with alzheimers
disease. it's really sad to see. she
has been slapped and spit on and cursed
at in some very foul language. it's really
sad because these poor folks don't
know what they are doing. not all of
them get the care they need, even though
it costs through the roof for minimal care.
the facilities she worked at are closed
now, and they had those door alarms,
but sometimes the residents would get
away. some would say they were going
to work in their field, or going to the
bus stop to meet their child they didn't
have, etc. i hope your dad can live out
his life without incident.
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Offline powderman

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #2 on: March 14, 2013, 05:58:13 PM »
ROG. Sorry about your Dad. When Pattys Mom was in that rehab most didn't want to be there. One man would wheel up to the nurses station every morning waiting for his Son to come get him, he never did. Another ollady escaped several times but they got her back.
 
One nursing home put up a fake bus stop sign and would routinely catch residents there. POWDERMAN.  :o :o
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Offline Oldshooter

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #3 on: March 14, 2013, 06:07:35 PM »
Lived the Alzheimer's story with my grandparents, when asked how my grandmother was , "pop" would say " she forgets she forgot" .  The disease is harder on the family  than the patient because...... Well you know why.


Take good care of your mom cause she is the one in the tight spot and thanks for the post.
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Offline oldandslow

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2013, 03:31:13 AM »
I can understand what your family is going thru. My mother lived to be almost 106 and for the last seven years she had no idea who any of her family was or where she was. She lived in the past when she was a young girl. It was rough on her as she was always trying to do what she though was needed of her by her family of that period of her life and couldn't. It was tough on me too seeing her like that. Still puts tears in my eyes when I remember. The front door of the nursing home she was in wasn't locked although there were two sets of doors to go through. My mother made it outside a couple of times and they put a wrist alarm on her. It would set off a loud bell to alert the staff when the wearer went thru the first door.

Offline Brett

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2013, 03:53:49 AM »
Sorry about your dad.   I do floor care and carpet cleaning in a number of Assisted Living facilities around North and South Carolina so I work around Alzheimer patients all the time.  Sometimes you can't help but chuckle at some of their antics.

Had one poor old woman one time think I was her son.  I just went along with it and gave her a good bye kiss when it was time to leave.

Had another tell me that she was being held against her will and that her kids did not know where she was.  She insisted that I help her to escape or she would tell the cops and make sure that I would see my name in all of the Chicago Papers. 

Another time I had just finished up a job and was in the process of packing up my gear when I looked up and saw a woman squatting in the middle of the hallway with her night gown hiked up dropping a deuce on the carpet I just cleaned.

Had an old guy try to hijack my extractor and when I stopped him he threatened to punch me out.  He was a little scary.

Oh, a word of caution.  Not all Memory Care residents are elderly and some can appear as lucid as you and I at times.  On one occasion I had a nice conversation with a sharp dressed gentleman who looked to be a few years younger than myself and I assumed he was there visiting a parent or something... turned out he was a resident.  So never let anyone out a locked door until you get the nod from one of the staff.  There have instances where I've had visitors annoyed with me because I refused to let them out but it's better than letting someone out who shouldn't be out.  You should see the panic that unfolds when a resident goes AWOL.
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Offline Sourdough

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2013, 08:36:53 AM »
When I lived in Maryland, the couple across the street were getting along in years.  I knew the woman had issues, but she was there everyday while the husband worked.  One day I see her outside as usual taking care of her flowers in the front yard.  Only problem was she was nude.  Two women had stopped and were trying to convince her to go inside.  She was confused and did not understand what the problem was.  The husband came right home and apologized to all the neighbors.  Next day there she is again.  Seems for years the husband would get up and go to work, leaving his wife in bed sleeping.  She would get up shower, get dressed then go take care of her lawn, and flowers.  Only now she was forgetting the get dressed part.  The kids were grown and gone, and they had spent everything they had getting them through college.  He had to work to pay the groceries and utilities, and needed a few more years to retire.  He had to do something.     

I talked this over with a guy at work who I knew lived in a nudist community.  My friend contacted the guy across the street, and had him come to visit the community.  There was a nice moble home there with a beautiful lawn and flower garden.  The occupants had moved out of the country.  The couple from across the street moved in.  It worked out good for them.  He could still work, his wife could still work her flowers nude and no one cared.  They now lived inside a gated community, where she could not wonder off.  The people living in the community were mostly retired and watched out for her.  When I left they were still living there and had been there four years.  While visiting my co-worker and his family one day I walked up to her and said "Hi".  She leaned towards me and said, "You know I like it here, but some of the people living here are strange".  "Some of these folks run around with out any clothes on".  I could not help chuckling, there she stood telling me that and she herself was as naked as the day she was born. 

Alzheimers treats some folks different.  Dad remembers me, but can recognize Mom or any of my brothers.  He think Mom's younger sister is his wife.  He also thinks his younger bothers widow Dorathy is his girlfriend, and that they are dating.  Two weeks ago he told me He and Dorathy had just gotten back from vacation to New York.  But Dad also has some issues with his diapers.  He'll take them off then run down the hall to the bathroom, naked from the waist down.  Forgetting he has a bathroom in his room.  Dad also tries to get outside so he can smoke his pipe.  Only he does not have a pipe anymore.  He wears a monitor on his ankle that triggers an alarm if he goes near the door.  If he should somehow get outside the tracking monitor will tell them where he is.  We took him out Christmas to my brothers house.  When we got back the staff knew we were coming by the monitor, and were waiting at the front door to check Dad back in.   
Where is old Joe when we really need him?  Alaska Independence    Calling Illegal Immigrants "Undocumented Aliens" is like calling Drug Dealers "Unlicensed Pharmacists"
What Is A Veteran?
A 'Veteran' -- whether active duty, discharged, retired, or reserve -- is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America,' for an amount of 'up to, and including his life.' That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country today who no longer understand that fact.

Offline Oldshooter

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2013, 08:51:31 AM »
When my grandfather finally went south, the nurses would come in and he'd drop a deuce in his pants and grab a hand full and toss it at them.  When I was told about it I went to see him and waved my cap across the door and called out before entering.


Yep, nudity is prevalent with the oldtimers disease.  But at least there is less cloths to clean when accidents happen and there is no place to keep " ammunition"


They do get belligerent at times as well. I blocked a right cross to my chin once from my 5 ft tall grandmother, while escorting her to bed one night.
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Offline Victor3

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #8 on: March 17, 2013, 01:43:38 AM »
 Gotta laugh; crying's no help.


 I drive my Mom to the senior center for lunch two days a week. After lunch she's forgotten I'm there to take her home. The other oldsters usually direct her toward my truck but sometimes she 'escapes' while nobody's looking and tries to start walking home. She'd never get there.


 Old-timer's disease is dang hard. Love for my Mom and humor are the only things that keep me half-way sane.
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Offline Sourdough

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #9 on: March 17, 2013, 07:10:01 AM »
One of the things that bothers me when I go there is the people I know that is there, and the changes they have made.  My Dad still looks like my Dad.  Older but still looks like the person I grew up with.  Mom took me around and pointed out individuals she thought I should know.  There sat my Spanish teacher in a wheel chair according to her.  Nothing like he had been when I studied under him in high school.  He had been a big man, broad shoulders, and very animated in his movements.  The person sitting in the wheeled lounge chair was a small withered person.  He sat with his mouth open, staring off into space.  Down the hall sat Rudy.  Ruby had babysat me when I was an infant, she and Dad had gone to school together.  Ruby had been my 7th grade History and Science teacher.  She too sat and stared off into space.  Ruby has since died.  Dad got a new room mate.  I barely remember him from the days when I worked at the grocery store.  He was good friends with the store manager.  They had both been in the Marines in Korea.  He is 87 and we sat and had some interesting conversations.  Sometimes he thinks he is back in Korea, and he has to sneak out and kill those dirty commies.  So he is now tied to his bed at all times. 
Where is old Joe when we really need him?  Alaska Independence    Calling Illegal Immigrants "Undocumented Aliens" is like calling Drug Dealers "Unlicensed Pharmacists"
What Is A Veteran?
A 'Veteran' -- whether active duty, discharged, retired, or reserve -- is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America,' for an amount of 'up to, and including his life.' That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country today who no longer understand that fact.

Offline nw_hunter

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #10 on: March 18, 2013, 03:22:10 PM »
Cancer is a terrible disease, but darned if I don't think Alzheimer is worse. It has such a devastating effect on the entire family.
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Offline Sourdough

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #11 on: March 18, 2013, 04:49:21 PM »
We left for vacation in mid December.  We had seen a good friend a couple of weeks before we left.  She was looking good and taking good care of her two girls and Husband.  She was a Vet herself and we really thought a lot of her.  While we were in Virginia, I got an E-mail from another friend that told me she had been diagnoised with breast cancer again.  This was the third time.  She was being sent to a hospital In Oregon.  Friends were collecting money to get the kids down there with her.  A week later I was e-mailed that she had fallen and broke her leg.  Two days later I got an e-mail that said she had passed.  Two weeks from diagnosis to the end.  That was a shock, especially for my wife.  My wife has been diagnoised three times with Breast Cancer, and once with overian cancer.  It's hit her pretty hard, me too.

Then there is my Dad.  We have been sitting watching him slowly go down hill for four years now.  It's drawn out for such a long time, and the stress of dealing with it daily is really telling on my Mom and my Brother David who lives there and is the one who is called at all hours to help them out. 
Where is old Joe when we really need him?  Alaska Independence    Calling Illegal Immigrants "Undocumented Aliens" is like calling Drug Dealers "Unlicensed Pharmacists"
What Is A Veteran?
A 'Veteran' -- whether active duty, discharged, retired, or reserve -- is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America,' for an amount of 'up to, and including his life.' That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country today who no longer understand that fact.

Offline Ranger99

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #12 on: March 18, 2013, 04:53:33 PM »
i'll pray for you.
cancer is an evil thing.
i've lost several relations and
friends to it.
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Offline Oldshooter

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #13 on: March 18, 2013, 05:28:30 PM »
Yes, the cancer is ugly and quick sometimes. Mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in August of 09 and we buried her in September. It was hard to watch her starve to death. Thats what she did, the tumors blocked the digestive system and she couldn't eat.
 
Not sure which is worse, I do know the patient doesn't suffer with alzheimers as much as the cancer patient does. The Family or care giver, or spouse  takes the beating with alzheimers
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Offline Victor3

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Re: Runner at the nursing home.
« Reply #14 on: March 18, 2013, 10:35:49 PM »
Not sure which is worse, I do know the patient doesn't suffer with alzheimers as much as the cancer patient does.


 I was talking with a lady at work who's Mom is in the final stages of Alzheimer's. I mentioned that more than anything, my Mom dreads having to go into a facility. She replied, "Ya know, sad as it seems, they really don't know the difference near the end."


 I suppose that's a blessing.
"It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Insensibly, one begins to twist facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts."

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