Mr. Layton, I'm no expert either, but after teaching the handgun to many dozens of people over the years, I'm quite convinced that the grip is the most important consideration in matching the gun to the shooter. No one shoots well with a grip that's too big for their hands, but many large-pawed shooters do well with undersize stocks. It also works that way with rifles, an overly long length of pull is ungainly, but one a little short is no problem. Most of the guns I've loved but sold later just didn't have the right feel. I have small hands and long fingers, and I bet I've spent five hundred dollars on grips in the last 20 years, always trying to make the gun fit me better. Once I found the right grip, my shooting improved, my confidence soared, and life was good. There is no one perfect grip for everyone, but some designs are better than others. The CZ-75 family is especially ergonomic, the Ruger revolvers with the grip frame stud can use nearly any grip imaginable, and there are others. While I think it's a shame that custom grips have to cost as much as they do, I will also say that few things can get a shooter and a handgun to do well together.
Good triggers also help a lot, too!
And quality sights are nice to have, as well. :roll:
PJ