thanks for bringing that up guardsgunner...
with my .495 balls in my 50 cal, I use soft lead, not wheel weights or range scrap. The fairly pure lead is more willing to deform when I wap on the ball starter with a mallet.
If the provided balls are not near pure lead, you will not be able to push the fit as close as I do. Pure lead marks with a fingernail fairly easily, lead with tin and antimony in it doesn't mark as easily. Best is to compare against some known samples to get a feel for it... like some commercially produced cast handgun bullets for instance. They should be "hard" lead.
I use a Saeco bullet hardness tester to check alloys accurately.
Now that it is all coming back to me, there are so many variables that maybe the best thing to do is not worry too much about it and play with patch thickness.... the tighter the better untill it becomes too hard to start them.