GM is recalling all 1955 through 1957 Chevrolet automobiles, citing safety issues. The recalled vehicles will be retrofitted with ABS brakes, air bags, catalytic converters, three cylinder hybrid engines, and little flower pots next to the steering wheel. This recall applies to all models, including those "hot rodded" (applying variances from factory specifications).
When asked about the recall, Tom Syles, president of the South Florida Street Rods Association, said "F*** You B***h! We're not doing that S***." Mr. Syles was then arrested and jailed without bail by National Highway Transportation Safety Administration (NHTSA) officials. The NHTSA now has police powers in all 50 states and US territories. Mr. Syles is not expected to be seen again. In lieu of flowers the Syles family "requests" that donations be made to the US Treasury.