Author Topic: Draft Seniors  (Read 388 times)

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Offline Sourdough

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Draft Seniors
« on: May 04, 2009, 06:01:29 AM »
Got this from my younger brother.  Just a bit of humor for the day.  His wife also chimed in on this, she agrees also.  Enjoy.  Rog
PS, the big type went away in the copy and paste.




    Drafting Guys over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-

     
     
    New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!

     
    I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

     
     
    For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds.  Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

     
    Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts!  I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some (censored word) that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

     
     
    An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get  up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical s-of-a-b....

     
    If  captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

     
     
    Boot camp would be easier for old guys.  We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

     
    They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

     
     
    Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

     
    An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl.  He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

     
     
    These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

     
    Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

     

     
    ***How about recruiting Women over 50 ...with PMS !!! You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!!


    Our Husbands have already taught us to shoot, and in most cases we shoot better than they do.

     
    If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we  will have it secured the first night!

     
    Share this with your senior friends. It's purposely in big type so they can read it.
Where is old Joe when we really need him?  Alaska Independence    Calling Illegal Immigrants "Undocumented Aliens" is like calling Drug Dealers "Unlicensed Pharmacists"
What Is A Veteran?
A 'Veteran' -- whether active duty, discharged, retired, or reserve -- is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America,' for an amount of 'up to, and including his life.' That is honor, and there are way too many people in this country today who no longer understand that fact.

Offline Oldshooter

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Re: Draft Seniors
« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2009, 06:23:10 AM »
LOL just no Basic training, That would kill me! save me for the fire fight, and drop me off at my foxhole in a truck, no running. And I guarantee I wont retreat unless some one comes and picks me up!  ;D



 
Quote
If  captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.


Hey I aint sixty yet but I resemble that remark!

Great post thanks Rog
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Offline Heather

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Re: Draft Seniors
« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2009, 06:56:06 AM »
lol  :D
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Offline LONGTOM

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Re: Draft Seniors
« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2009, 07:50:48 AM »
A very pleasant few moments in an other wish crazy mixed up world we live in.


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Offline Cement Man

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Re: Draft Seniors
« Reply #4 on: May 04, 2009, 08:09:03 AM »
I like the part about the pushups.  After I got out I swore I'd never do another one.  And I haven't!!  :D

My wife got me a a set of barbells to lift.  I do that - so I can sweep the floor under them.
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Offline nomosendero

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Re: Draft Seniors
« Reply #5 on: May 04, 2009, 09:58:37 AM »
Maybe that's what BO is refering to when he talks about afordable healthcare
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