Dear Mr. Ex President Klinton:
I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me,
I voted for Klinton-Gore." So, I sat down and
reflected on that, and I am sending my "Thank you" for
what you have done, specifically:
1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers,
Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning,
Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick. Did I leave
anyone out?
2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral
sex. I had really planned to wait until they were
older to discuss it with them, but now they know more
about it than I did as a senior in college.
3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in
the work place (especially the White House) and on
the job is OK, and all you have to know is what the
meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that
certain sexual acts are not sex, and one person may
have sex while the other one involved does NOT have sex.
4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of
impeachment to a new generation and
demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag the
Dog" could be plausible after all.
5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent,
Gerald Ford look graceful, Richard Nixon look honest,
Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy look
moral.
6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who
have pled the 5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have
fled the country to avoid testifying about Democratic
campaign fund raising.
7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4
imprisonments from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55
criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so far)
in the other "Clinton" scandals.
8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half,
"gutting" much of our foreign policy, and flying all
over the world on "vacations" carefully disguised as
necessary trips.
9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of
dollars--- I really didn't need it in the first place,
and I can't think of a more well deserving group of
recipients for my hard-earned dollars than
jet fuel for all of your globe-trotting. I understand you, the
family and your cronies have logged in more time
aboard Air Force One than any other administration.
10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks
for the 140 pardons of convicted felons and indicted
felons-in-exile. We will love to have them rejoin
society.
11. Thanks also for removing the White House
silverware. I'm sure that Laura Bush didn't like the
pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming
gifts you've received from your "friends."
12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West
Wing of the White House for vandalizing and destroying
government property on the way out. I also appreciate
removing all of that excess weight (China, silverware,
linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic
compass, flight manuals, etc.) out of Air Force 1. The
weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less tax
dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!
13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary
enjoys the $8 million dollar advance for her upcoming
"tell-all"
book and you, Bill, the $10 million advance for your
memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!
14. The last and most important point - thank
you for forcing Israel to let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist
pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus in Israel in 1986.
The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As
part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in
1993, Israel had to agree to release so-called
"political prisoners". However, the Israelis would not
release any with blood on their hands. The American
President at the time, Bill Klinton, and his Secretary
of State, Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all
prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed Atta was freed
and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane
into Tower One of the World Trade Center. This was
reported by many of the American TV networks at the
time that the terrorists were first identified. It was
censored in the US from all later reports. Why
shouldn't Americans know the real truth?
What a guy!!
If you agree that the American public must be made
aware of these facts, pass this on. God bless America
and THANK YOU (once again) for spending my taxes so
wisely and frugally.
SINCERELY,
A US Citizen
PS Please pass along a special thank you
to Al Gore for "inventing" the Internet, without which I would
not be able to send this wonderful factual message.
Original author is unknown. I've seen this floating around the internet almost since Klinton left office.
GB
