sad story

[slim rem 7]

it seems a couple that both had alzhiemers ,went out side without thier keys..they found them both frozen
when the neighbors noticed them setting on thier porch ,,too long in the cold..we all gotta get outa this life some how.. i like to think they just went to sleep on thier front porch an woke up to greetings from long passed loved ones.. what a great day for them ,,this must be..
 when i leave the house ,i leave the front door unlocked just to prevent this from happening to my sweet.. slim.ps yall have a great day.

[Brett]

Wow, that is a sad story.  Did they live in a very rural area?  Why didn't they just go to a neighbors house?  Sure it was not a case of double suicide?  Not trying to be ugly, just seems that they could have done something other than just sit down on the porch and wait to die. 

[slim rem 7]

people with alzhiemers don t have the same ability to solve problems.. thats why they need constant care..
 they just didn t think to seek a neighbors help,i guess. slim
 its hard to imagine unless you have dealt with it in your family..

[Brett]

I guess your right about that Slim.  I've been working in a lot of assisted living homes lately and have some contact with Alzheimer residents and I can see how that might be a possibility.  Sometimes they certainly do not act rationally.  Some in the later stages of the disease can not even feed themselves.   Thank the Good Lord that I have not had to deal with that (yet) in my own family.   You and your wife are in my prayers Slim. 

[Graybeard]

Why look at it as a sad story? I look on it as a happy story instead.

Having seen first hand how alzheimers affects folks it's not a pretty way to end your life. It is in fact a rather sad way to spend your last years and I certainly would rather not be around than to be around with it. Dad had it for the last several years of his life. I'd not wish that end on my worst enemy.

So why not look on it as a happy story. An old couple who'd spent their best years together loving each other now have gone out together peacefully and quietly and have no more suffering to put up with in this world. If we believe in GOD and Heaven and that there is a better thing waiting for us on the other side of death how can we be sorry for someone who was suffering terribly on this side of life who has now passed on to better things. And did it together in each other's arms?

Some times I think we living souls look at things the wrong way. They are now at peace, at rest and have gone on to whatever reward awaits us on the other side of death.

Before all they had was a miserable life of suffering not knowing each other or anyone else most of the time and needing someone to care for them being a burden on their loved ones. Nope I don't see this as a sad story at all but as a happy one.

[Dee]

I agree GB. I don't want to waste away with alzheimer's, while the family suffers watching. Just come get me God, when I get in that condition.

[Sourdough]

GB:  I have to agree with you.  My father has alzheimers and is getting to the point where he needs constant supervision.  Dad had always been a man to build or fix anything around the farm or home.  Dad has built beautiful fireplaces and chimneys for many people.  He worked for one of my brothers who builds custom homes.  Dad did electrical, carpenter, mason, all kinds of work, and was very good at any thing he did.  

A few weeks ago one of the smoke detectors started beeping.  Dad removed one thinking it was the problem.  The beeping still could be heard.  Dad went and removed the door bell from the wall thinking that was what was beeping.  Mom noticed what he was doing and made him stop.  She called one of my brothers to come over and fix the smoke detector.  While waiting Dad took the one he had taken down, which was not the one with a bad battery, out to the garage.  He got a hammer and tried to tap it till it quite beeping.  He smashed it to bits.

Mom had an energy audit, and then had a contractor come and replace the weatherstripping around the doors and windows.  Dad got it in his mind that the weatherstripping was creating a problem with the door going out to the garage.  Dad went and got a hammer to try and adjust the weatherstripping.  He adjusted it alright, now part of the door frame needs to be replaced.

While I was there two weeks ago, we locked up all the hammers, drills, and saws.

But the worst thing that happened during my stay was when we stopped to eat.  My brother Rob (Lionhunter) and I ordered a meal that came with a salad, Mom ordered fish and chips.  Dad decided to have what Mom had.  The waitress brought out Rob and My salads and we ate them.  I noticed Dad kept looking at our salads, and seemed confused.  Then when the waitress brought out Mom and Dad's order, Dad looked at her and said "Don't we get a salad too"?  The waitress said "If you want one I can get you one, but it will have to be added to your bill".  Dad got mad and said "Well, I don think we will ever be coming back here again".  Dad said this real loud and in a very nasty attitude.  Mom, Rob, and I were shocked.  Dad had never been like that before.  My Dad had always been a very easy going person, and would never say anything to hurt anyone like that.  

We all know it is the disease, but it has me concerned.  I saw the look in Dad's eyes, and I know he was just one step away from getting violent.  I envisioned him jumping up and slapping that young woman.  What's going to happen once he crosses that line?  And with the rapidity of his progression into this sad never never land, I can see it happening soon.

[Cabin4]

My dad suffered from a combination of Parkens and Alzheimers. Its disgusting way to go over the long term. I wish his life would have been taken earlier then to see someone be pulled through that mess. Leaving this earth early when the future is as bleek as it is for these folks is not a bad thing.

[SHOOTALL]

I agree with GB and others .

[rex6666]

I have a little different twist.
My Dad was 86 in good health for 86 he had a stroke and died about 8 hours
later. My mother 24 hours had a heart attack and died 51 hours hafter my dad
these people had lived together  close to 70 years, i don't think it could have happened any better.

[guzzijohn]

A few weeks ago here in Kansas an elderly couple that had been married for I think over 60 years were badly hurt in an auto accident. Apparently the wife was for sure dying so other family members asked if her husband could be moved to the same room. When the move took place they placed the couples hands together. During that day both of their blood pressures and heart beats synchronized and then declined at the same rate until they died within a minute of each other.
GuzziJohn

[williamlayton]

Nobody gets out alive.
Alzheimers is sodifferent that most who have not been thru it with another can't understand why folks do what they do.
They are in there somewhere.
Folks just cannot recognized or make decisions. They can do but don't know why or can they control this doing---they just do.
Nothing you can say or do for them to make it better.
Blessings

[Slowhanddd]

I've told my four sons,"Don't let me forget where my bullets are".Wont go out that way.The old couple in the OP's post is really a pretty nice,but sad ending.Slow

[Redtail1949]

i have to agree with gb on this one.

i have a longtime hunting partner who is 63 years old and is entering into the beginning stages of that terrible disease. i took him out to shoot several times in the last week or so and i was really saddened as i watched him try to load and shoot as well talk about old hunting trips we have had. he would get lost in whatever he was doing and had a lot of trouble maintaining a line of thought.

it seems to me that it must be advanceing rapidly as there is a big change in the just the last three months. i know that he senses something is wrong and i know he does not want to end life not knowing who he is or anyone else.

it is sad.

[torpedoman]

I had the horror of watching my mother in law spend 15 years dying of Alzheimer. The old couple were very lucky. I cannot think of a worse way to go and i pray every day that it does not affect my bride.

[Brett]

After giving it more thought I can agree that this occurrence could very well have been a blessing.

[nw_hunter]

it seems a couple that both had Alzheimer's ,went out side without thier keys..they found them both frozen
when the neighbors noticed them setting on thier porch ,,too long in the cold..we all gotta get outa this life some how.. i like to think they just went to sleep on thier front porch an woke up to greetings from long passed loved ones.. what a great day for them ,,this must be..
 when i leave the house ,i leave the front door unlocked just to prevent this from happening to my sweet.. slim.ps yall have a great day.

 Alzheimer's is a terrible disease! I have watched a couple of friends die from it, and I cannot think of a more horrible way to go.

One of my neighbor's is starting into the advanced stages of it, and I can see changes in him, month by month.

He is a master wood carver, and still tries to do some projects, but he gets frustrated, and cannot remember which tool to use, or even what piece to work on. He gets angry with himself, and knows he is losing it, but is powerless to do anything about it.

Like GB, I think the old couple you mention in this thread went out as well as they could with this disease taking over their lives.

 

[slim rem 7]

 yep greybeard.. thats how it seems to me..
 mom an dad both passed with it..somehow mom kept her sense of humor while dad didn t..
 id go dn an give my sister an her husband most weekends off...
 on the way home id always pray to god.. id say father my dad was just to good a man to have to go
through it..in my heart i know god knew what he was doing. but id plead with him to take my dad home..
  now another side of it..
 my karry has severe dementia that the doctor likens to alzhiemers..she had an tyrant first husband..
 it wouldn t do to tell the story.. but now due to the desease she no longer carries memories of the things he did to her.. so god found a way for her not to continue to harbor the excusable ,,but still damaging
affects of the burden of carrying those bitter  memories..i personally think its gods way of taking the burden of unforgiveness off her shoulders..
 we have fun every night talking an joking.. she is now like a camera taking pics without film in it.. but retains [thank god] ,,her sweet demeanor and nfunny sense of humor]..i keep all conversations on the present and future type subject ..we set an listen to good music in the morning an i joke with her about
how i better not catch her looking at any good looking fellows or nothing like that.. shes 25-30 now..
 but still she ll pop me in the shoulder an tell  me she s gonna put her foot where the sun don t shine if i ever say that again..5 min later i ll say it again mabe.. its always the first time.. that kind of stuff keeps us
giggling a lot o nights..then i get to look at her face as she drifts off to sleep with a satisfied half smile on her face..then i again thank god for her..she s my sweet karry. its stressful at times but definitly we making lemonade out of lemons.. pretty dang good too.. thanks again for all prayers said by those on this forum.. god works in mysterious ways for sure.. slim
 

[teamnelson]

slim, it might be a lesson for us all to live our lives like a camera with no film.  God bless you and your karry!

I can think of no better way to finish out my life than holding my wife's hand.

[slim rem 7]

 amen nelson..it can be really sweet at times.. :)slim
 believe me when i say..i know this is not my strength ,,but the grace of god leading me
to be capable enough,,to be up to this task..thank you my father..this available to anybody willing to give faith a chance..not jmo .. i know its true.. you can also.

[slim rem 7]

next morning.. last night it dawned on me as we went to sleep to her gentle celtic women music..
 she s leaving me..slowly shes leaving me.. i was filled with dread of that same bed when she
is no longer in it with me..nothing strong about me then.. just a terrible dread of me being there without her..
 don t know how i ll make it through that.. mabe you guys who have lost the one you love ,,to
the other side ..can tell me how you made it through..i can tell you this there won t be but one set of foot prints n the sand..he ll have to carry me..i love you fellas for careing.. slim

[Graybeard]

Death for the one who dies has no real sting. Oh some die painfully and with great suffering and truly for those death is the best thing that can come to them. I many times prayed for GOD to take mom who suffered terribly from Parkinson's before she finally went. That wasn't life it was pure misery for her and I'm sure for her death was a welcome thing.

Death is only bad for those of us left behind when a loved one dies. We miss them and we morn for them but it's really not them but for ourselves that we feel so bad. It is however human nature and the close bonding that we are capable of that creates in us this feeling of total loss when a close loved one dies.

I have no words to help you thru it Slim. I've lost both parents but in honesty we were not close. They were mean and abusive and that caused the bond to be weaker than it otherwise would have been and caused the period of morning to be far shorter and less painful than it would normally have. I've lost a friend who in reality was closer to me than even my brother is and that was a loss I still morn and I still miss him. But that's not the same bond as that man and woman share after many long years of marriage.

Know in your heart that when a loved one is suffering and wandering even if only in their own mind that what this earthly realm holds for them is slipping away and that they are being called to something far better. Death seems so final for us left here on earth but in reality this is but a temporary stop over for us on a far greater journey and until death takes us from this mortal realm we cannot join Jesus. For any CHRISTian making that journey to join Him in Heaven is the goal we seek. So just remember in your heart that the only way to complete that journey is to find death. It waits for us all and none get out of this world except by it.

I know we cannot as it just isn't built into our nature but we should rejoice when a loved one passes from this mortal realm and joins Jesus in a far greater peace that waits just on the far side of death. If it were possible for us to set our minds to this great truth then we should wish a speedy farewell to those whom we love who can no longer enjoy the fullness of life here. Their passing is for them not a bad but rather a very good thing.

It is sadly tho us left behind who have a huge hole in our lives once filled by that loved one who must cope and who must try to remember how better off the missing loved one is. Know that one day soon we too will be joining them in the glory of our Lord Jesus and that while we too might then leave behind a hole in someone else's life that then our suffering will be over and we'll be reunited with those we love and with Jesus and that suffering will be no more.

To be brutally honest the way this life is and the direction our country and our world is heading today I think the truly lucky ones are those who do not remain here on this crumbling earth much longer. I do not fear death it holds no sting for me. It rather just means that I will leave behind the suffering and misery of this earth and that I will go to join with Jesus and those loved ones who have gone before. Whatever awaits us on the far side of death has to be better than what is here. We just have to each wait our turn and when a loved one goes ahead of us we must try to remember that for them the reward all CHRISTians pray for has now come and hope that in some small way that eases the burden of our hearts knowing that one more soul has go back to whence it came.

I don't really expect these words to comfort you but hopefully in time something said here might be remembered and perhaps a small smile can come over your face when you remember after that time comes that she is in a far better place and waiting for the day when you join her there. It's all the comfort we mortals can have this side of death.

So make the most of the time you have with her while you do still have her. Ease her time as best you can while she is with you and in your heart know that when you no longer have her here with you on earth that she then has Jesus to be with her until your time comes around to join them in a far better place then we now have.

[slim rem 7]

 thanks greybeard.. your testimony is beautiful.. im gonna save it to read when i need to ..
 thanks again for sharing .. god bless you,slim