The two brands Ive used are alcohol based. They seem to 'carry' pigment better into the wood grain and dont continue to raise the grain with repeated applications like the water based.
Another trick Ive used with success is to 'bone' the wood after staining (with either base stain). I use a small piece of polished antler (though a hard plastic may work as well) which fits me comfortably. It is important not to have any ridges which would gouge into the wood surface. Press firmly and work a small area at a time to compress the wood fibers after you have the color you want. It will smooth and polish the surface and look quite good, but still will need topcoats to seal and protect it. If you used a water based stain and got raised grain this will work better than trying to 'whisker' it again, which will mess up the stain tones.
