Author Topic: Figures  (Read 966 times)

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Offline jh45gun

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« on: March 07, 2005, 05:03:53 PM »
Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo were all talking one day.
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>>Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in
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>>the world."
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>>Tom Thumb said , "I must be the smallest person in the world".
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>>Quasimodo said, "I have to be the ugliest person in the world".
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>>They decided to go to the Guiness Book of World Records to have their
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>>claims verified.
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>>Sleeping Beauty went first and came out looking deliriously happy. "Its
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>>offficial, I AM the most beautiful girl in the world."
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>>Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant. "I am officially the
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>>smallest person in the world."
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>>Sometime later, Quasimodo came out looking confused and simply stated,
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>>"Who is Camilla Parker Bowles?"
Said I never had much use for one, never said I didn't know how to use it.

Offline Nightrain52

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« Reply #1 on: March 07, 2005, 05:42:15 PM »
:-D  :)  :-D  :)  :-D  :)  :D
FREEDOM IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR-ARE YOU WILLING TO DIE FOR IT--------IT'S HARD TO SOAR LIKE AN EAGLE WHEN YOU ARE SURROUNDED BY TURKEYS

Online Graybeard

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« Reply #2 on: March 07, 2005, 06:18:49 PM »
I give up; "Who is Camilla Parker Bowles?"


Bill aka the Graybeard
President, Graybeard Outdoor Enterprises
256-435-1125

I am not a lawyer and do not give legal advice.

Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life anyone who believes in Him will have everlasting life!

Offline Rustyinfla

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« Reply #3 on: March 07, 2005, 06:53:00 PM »
Graybeard,

      That's Prince Charlie's new squeeze. That old gal wold make a frieght train take a dirt road. I mean if Helen of Troy had a face that would launch a thousand ships this broad would have sunk them all. I bet when she was a little girl they tied a pork chop around her neck to get the dog to play with her and the dog just sat there and whimpered. She fell out of the ugly tree and hit every limb on the way down. Been rode hard and put up wet. Has a face that looks like 40 miles of bad dirt road. I'm sure when she was a kid her mom fed her with a slingshot from across the room.

   Oh and she's a perfect match for the Prince. You've seen him. His ears stick out so far he looks like a '49 Packard going down the road with the doors open. He ain't no prize his self. Got teeth so big he could eat a peanut butter and jelly samich thru a picket fence. A product of royal inbreeding.

       Rusty <><
If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tuff

Offline Dubious Dan

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« Reply #4 on: March 07, 2005, 07:25:34 PM »

Offline Brett

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« Reply #5 on: March 08, 2005, 01:50:19 AM »
:shock: Dubious Dan that link needs a warning label.   :lol:
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Offline Dubious Dan

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« Reply #6 on: March 08, 2005, 04:49:20 AM »
Quote from: Brett
:shock: Dubious Dan that link needs a warning label.   :lol:


Taken care of. In the future I'll be more careful about such things.

Offline RockinB

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« Reply #7 on: March 08, 2005, 07:05:33 AM »
Good thing Charlie and Camilla are past child bearing years. Of course who's to say they don't have a few little Quasimodos of their own tucked away in the Tower of London.

Offline bgjohn

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« Reply #8 on: March 08, 2005, 08:40:32 AM »
She just got old and funny looking. Look around, you'll see others. Then look in the mirror! :eek:  :shock:
JM :(
I know nothing. I am only a messenger.

Offline bgjohn

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« Reply #9 on: March 08, 2005, 08:45:17 AM »
Take a look at the queen. She's got a lot of class, but she's got a face like a bulldogs A$$! :lol:
JM
I know nothing. I am only a messenger.

Offline clodbuster

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Camilla
« Reply #10 on: March 08, 2005, 12:07:33 PM »
Dudes!  If you think "C" is that ugly you haven't been to Kansas City.  We got some double ug's here.  'Sides,  she's got all her teeth from the pic.
Preserve the Loess Hills!!!

Offline Shorty

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« Reply #11 on: March 08, 2005, 01:32:43 PM »
Dudes, it's the English!  A race of people that ugly HAD to conquer the world just to keep from being laughed at!  :wink:   I know, I'm one of them!  :oops:

Offline Bigdog57

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« Reply #12 on: March 09, 2005, 09:55:51 AM »
:)   Have y'all forgotten Ter-AH-sa Heinz-Kerry so quickly?  Now, she's 'coyote-ugly'!    :shock:

Offline williamlayton

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« Reply #13 on: March 10, 2005, 12:28:01 AM »
BIG--
He can not see her face for all the money in the way.
Blessings
TEXAS, by GOD

Offline Nightrain52

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« Reply #14 on: March 10, 2005, 06:01:33 AM »
As WILLIAM stated-Dollar signs can hide a whole lot of ugly. :-D  :-D  :-D  :D
FREEDOM IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR-ARE YOU WILLING TO DIE FOR IT--------IT'S HARD TO SOAR LIKE AN EAGLE WHEN YOU ARE SURROUNDED BY TURKEYS