FUTURE

[IntrepidWizard]

2029!
 
 
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formally known as           California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Baby conceived naturally - - scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines

[bullet maker]

   :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D        :-D  :-D  :-D    
very good, and it would be funner, if it wasn`t so close to probably being the truth :eek:

bullet maker

[SAWgunner]

Here's a couple more I came up with:

Northerners find themselves on the wrong side during Civil War.  Former New Yorker, Fran Rosenbaum is quoted as saying, "...Why can't they just give up, I don't understand why Southerners have so much pride...There are more of us than them down here anyway, you'd think they wanted us out."

Haliburton now using military armed escorts in Alaska.

Haiashu, formerly the U.S. state of Hawaii, opens new floating sushi bar/ karaoke club on the old USS Arizona memorial.

PETA proposes that "petting animals is degrading and harmful to the animal" said John "Little Bear" Smith, PETA president, and Berkeley professor in between sips of his latte.

[DirtyHarry]

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

 :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D  :-D