Author Topic: TX Version of Winders-VERY FUNNY  (Read 249 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Dano Bofano

  • Trade Count: (0)
  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 60
TX Version of Winders-VERY FUNNY
« on: January 10, 2006, 05:33:48 AM »
Texas Version of Windows 2002
     
Dear Customers:
     
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 2002 TEXAS EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of TEXAS. If you have
      one of these, you may need some help understanding the commands. The TEXAS edition may be recognized by the unique opening screen. It reads:
      WINDERS 02, with a background picture of Sam Houston superimposed on a Texas flag.
      It is shipped with a Remember the Alamo screen saver.

Please also note:
          The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
          My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
          Dial up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
          Control Panel is known as "The Dashboard"
          Hard Drive is referred to as "4 Wheel Drive"
          Floppies are "them little ol plastic disc thangs"
          Instead of an error message a "garbage bag and roll of duct tape" pops up.
     
CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN TEXAS EDITION:
          OK . . . . . . . . . . ats aw-right
          Cancel . . . . . . . stopdat
          Reset . . . . . . . . try er agin
          Yes . . . . . . . . . yep
          No . . . . . . . . . . noop
          Find . . . . . . . . . hunt fer it
          Go to. . . . . . . . over yonder
          Back . . . . . . . . back yonder
          Help . . . . . . . . hep me out here
          Stop . . . . . . . . kwitit
          Start . . . . . . . . crank er up
          Settings . . . . . . settins
          Programs . . . .  stuff at duz stuff
          Documents . . . stuff ah done did
     
Also note that TEXAS EDITION does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.
     
Some programs that are exclusive to Winders 02:
          Tiperiter . . . . . . . . A word processing program
          colerin book . . . . . a graphics program
          cyferin mersheen . calculator
          outhouse paper . . notepad
          iner-net . . . . . . . . ..Microsoft Explorer4.0
          pichers . . . . . . . . . A graphics viewer
     
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of
      the TEXAS EDITION. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version if y'all want to.
                                           
I hope this helps all y'all!
                            Billy Bob Gates
Proud to be a true American.