Author Topic: Quit! (Read 2794 times)

Double D · « **on:** March 03, 2010, 05:10:08 PM »

Our world here has been turned upside down. 4 months ago we moved Mother in law from Everett WA to here in Cut Bank so we could better care for her. She was having health problems and it was easier to care for her here. She does own a home here. About three weeks ago we took her to the doctor and and they found a tumor in her chest-lung cancer. We took her to Kalispell for diagnostic testing. We also had her medical records transferred over from Washington State Yesterday we went for the follow up and found out she has small cell lung cancer and we also found out she has had it for 9 months and didn't tell any one and didn't follow up. We also found out she has emphysema and has had it also for a while. We are now having to do the follow up to determine what treatment she should get.

She is 80 years old and has smoked since age 14 and quit 9 months ago. We have been with her for all the tests and conferences the past few weeks and we went with her today to the attorney, to make sure her trust is in order. The Doctors say because of her age and physical condition she is in for a rough time.

So you can imagine my time is going to be dedicated to helping my wife care for my mother in law.

Fella's if you have elderly relatives look out for them. Pay attention to them when they aren't feeling well. Pay attention even when they say things are fine.

And damit stop smoking!!

Cannoneer · « **Reply #1 on:** March 03, 2010, 07:57:15 PM »

I'm sorry to hear this Douglas, we went through the same situation with my mother. I pray for added strength for you, your wife and especially your mother-in-law to endure this trial.

BoomLover · « **Reply #2 on:** March 03, 2010, 09:39:38 PM »

We will also say prayers for all of you, Douglas! I agree, quit smoking, or never start! I quit over 15 years ago, and it's been one of the best things I ever did for myself and my family! Not preachin', just sayin'! BoomLover

KABAR2 · « **Reply #3 on:** March 04, 2010, 01:51:51 AM »

Douglas,

I Have a feel for what you are going through I lost my dad to lung cancer my mom to breast cancer and my Carol.

We are here if you need us, take care of your mom in law, your wife and yourself, your doing whats important first
& foremost,

I'll be keeping you all in my prayers.

Allen <><

phantom · « **Reply #4 on:** March 04, 2010, 03:32:30 AM »

Douglas I am sorry to hear about your Mother-in -law. It will be a tough road ahead. My Mother had small cell lung cancer. She passed when she was 59 .. The Docs gave the same estimate of time to live which is cruel. My Mother fought for years with this condition. In fact she had part of a lung removed which in hind sight was a mistake due to the fact it allowed it to spread in her case to her Brain which was done about 9 months before she lost the fight..It will be hard for everyone but even when things are at its worst be thankfull for the Day .I will pray for her your wife and yourself.

Brian

seacoastartillery · « **Reply #5 on:** March 04, 2010, 07:26:45 AM »

Mike and I applaud you and your wife's decision to bring the family together at this time and we will keep all of you in our prayers.

Tracy and Mike

Double D · « **Reply #6 on:** March 04, 2010, 09:47:45 AM »

Thanks everyone for your kind words and thoughts!

Zulu · « **Reply #7 on:** March 04, 2010, 11:01:51 AM »

I have yet to go through that. I have both my parents (both 80) and both my wife's parents (80 and 84).
So far so good.
I'm with you. Good luck.
Zulu

gulfcoastblackpowder · « **Reply #8 on:** March 04, 2010, 12:51:38 PM »

Fortunately my relatives all have the tendency of dying long before they can be considered elderly, so I've never had to deal with too much of that, but I know about dealing with a progressively dying parent (not cancer, but a genetic disease that I don't have, but my twin does, and my father's father died young of it as well), and can empathize. It's good that you are getting her affairs in order. I'll pray for her and your family.

JeffG · « **Reply #9 on:** March 04, 2010, 01:24:50 PM »

Prayers out to you!~ My mom died of emphysema....two packs a day since high school.

Cat Whisperer · « **Reply #10 on:** March 04, 2010, 01:52:01 PM »

Douglas -

You know that we're here to support you! Glad I quit smoking when I got out of H.S.

Not much one can say - it's all emotion. Keep us posted -

Terry C. · « **Reply #11 on:** March 04, 2010, 02:17:34 PM »

I grew up on a tenant farm where my grandfather grew tobacco.

You can't imagine how nasty it is until you've been literally covered head-to-toe in it.

Even so, I smoked from about 12 until after I graduated from high school. Mostly because "everyone else was doing it." After I got out of school it quickly lost its charm. I have not smoked since the late '70s.

My grandfather smoked all his life, (hand-rolled Prince Albert) until he was diagnosed with cancer of the throat and had a laryngectomy. He breathed through a hole in his neck for the rest of his life. Unable to smoke, he still continued to chew. By this time he was too old to work the tobacco patch anymore though he still grew corn on a limited basis.

For him, tobacco was a way of life and he never regretted growing it. He was a pioneer farmer (officially recognized) and was always a generation behind the rest of the growers that put quantity before quality. We were still using coal long after everyone else had switched to oil or gas. Everything was done by hand and watched over while other's machines crammed crappy tobacco that he would have thrown away into bulk curing barns.

But for me, I swore when I got out of school and out on my own that I would starve to death at the end of the rows before I ever set one foot back in a tobacco patch. And I've come very near starving more than once, but I have not gone back on my word yet.

I think DD's one-word title says it all... "Quit!"

Our thoughts and prayers are with you, Doug.

Artilleryman · « **Reply #12 on:** March 05, 2010, 01:55:12 AM »

Douglas, I understand what you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Double D · « **Reply #13 on:** March 05, 2010, 04:04:20 AM »

Thanks again everyone. Daily check in here everyday helps.

NVWalt · « **Reply #14 on:** March 05, 2010, 06:44:45 AM »

Doug,
Have also experianced that. Not pleasant but you can only give your best and whatever life throws at you don't let the bas##### get you down. Our prayers go out to you and your family...Walt

xo18thfa · « **Reply #15 on:** March 05, 2010, 09:43:16 AM »

I am very sorry to hear that about Mom. Our prayers are with you and the family

A big "hats off" to you for helping care for her. I think that's an important thing. The only meaningful thing we leave behind when we go is our family. Mom has a great daughter and son-in-law willing to take on this task.

My wife's parents live with us. Both had strokes. Mom died here at home 2 years ago. Dad has maybe a couple of months. The best care your Mom-in-law will get is at home. Love, attention, family, grand kids, good food, TV, dogs, cats, everything that makes a home. You don't get that in a nursing home.

I am not going to blow sunshine at you. It's a hard thing to care for sick parents and it will get worse. Your wife will need a break from time to time. You will have to step in. It will get overwhelming at some point, for both of you. Talk to your pastor, family, friends, maybe someone at a hospice. Make sure Mom has all her financial matters straight. Visit an estate planning lawyer if you need to. Make all the plans.

Yours truly.

Oldshooter · « **Reply #16 on:** March 05, 2010, 11:13:49 AM »

Just now saw the thread Double D. Sorry to hear about your MIL. Prayers are with you, I know what you all are going thru, Lost my mom to cancer in Sept. Best wishes to you and your family and praying for some relief for you all.

PM Fourie · « **Reply #17 on:** March 06, 2010, 06:07:13 AM »

Douglas sorry about the bad news, our prayers are with you and your family. Had similar experience with my Dad about 3 years back. He did not whant to Quit smoking. It did made me stop, so I am clean for 3 years now.
Pieter

smokemjoe · « **Reply #18 on:** March 10, 2010, 12:44:09 PM »

Your in our prayers Double D, There is 3 of us left now in our family. Been through all that on both sides of the family, Live like hell when your young .Getting old is HELL.

Double D · « **Reply #19 on:** March 10, 2010, 02:33:19 PM »

Again everyone thanks.

We saw the Doctor Monday. Confirmed small cell lung cancer in the extensive stage. It has spread to her lymph nodes in her neck a chest, her adrenal gland and a vertebrae. It has not spread to her liver or brain. Because of her age, emphysema, and the advance stage of the cancer, the only treatment available is weekly chemo which will only reduce the effects of the tumor. She is experiencing indigestion and the feeling that something is stuck in her esophagus. The PET scan shows a tumor in the center of he chest surrounding her esophagus. It is slightly larger tha a soft ball.

Mother in law went in for surgery today to have a valve inserted for administering the chemo. She gets one session od chemo one day a week.

I hope by including details that you smokers will think about this and quit smoking! Tomorrow is to late! Mother in law was always "going" to quit. She was diagnosed last year, so instead of getting treatment then, she quit smoking. To late!

RocklockI · « **Reply #20 on:** March 10, 2010, 03:21:48 PM »

Second single best desicion I ever made 27 years ago on the day my son was born . (marying my wife is first!)

My High School in N.C even had a smoking patio .

On Parris Island S.C. I had quit to get ready but about halfway thru boot camp I bummed a smoke when "SOMKERS DRAW ONE !" orders were given and started again ,there where some advantages (as I saw it to being a smoker) .......... It was a setative regaudless of what it may really do to your heart rate .........(increase). And as few as we got they always were .....Till you graduate by then I was hooked til my son Christopher was born in 82'

Smoke your cannon not your ciggerette .

Double D · « **Reply #21 on:** December 09, 2010, 06:27:39 PM »

About 3 am this morning MinL called us for help. Wife went up to her house and called for the Ambulance. The Ambulance transported to MinL to the Cut Bank hospital. Cut Bank Hospital transferred MinL to the Regional Hospital in Kalispell.

MinL is now sedated and on a breathing machine-life support. Test indicates she may have had a mild heart attack. The Cat scan shows the tumor has aggressively grown within the past few weeks and has consumed her entire right lung. It is putting pressure on her wind pipe and making it difficult for her to breathe, even with the breathing machine.

The doctors say that if we do nothing more than make her comfortable she may survive another day or two. If they treat her with chemotherapy and if she survives the chemo she may have another three to four weeks tops. Of course the chemotherapy will make her even more sick than she is. Regardless she would have to stay sedated and on the breathing machine in the hospital.

The Doctor has already told us there is no hope and the only reason she is still alive is because she is on life support. The Doctor is not inclined to give her treatment beyond keeping her comfortable. They say treatment would only add to her suffering. We will be going back to the hospital for a conference in the morning with her two doctors as is required to determine if she will be further treated or allowed to pass.

In 1992 we spent time in the hospital watching father in law slowly strangle to death from the ravages of tobacco induced emphysema. Now we have to watch this lovely women die from tobacco induced small cell lung cancer.

Guys let me say it again, right now, Quit Smoking!!! Emphysema and lung cancer is a horrible way to die.

GGaskill · « **Reply #22 on:** December 09, 2010, 06:37:26 PM »

Sounds like it is time to let go. My condolences.

BoomLover · « **Reply #23 on:** December 09, 2010, 07:56:05 PM »

Really sorry to hear this, Douglas...will add you and your family to my daily prayers......Jim

Cat Whisperer · « **Reply #24 on:** December 10, 2010, 12:59:39 AM »

Agree with George and Jim.

That doesn't make it easy, nothing will. But we feel your pain.

AND FOR THE REST OF Y'ALL - QUIT SMOKING!

Parrott-Cannon · « **Reply #25 on:** December 10, 2010, 01:17:33 AM »

My MIL was a second mother to me. We lost her 3 years ago. I am very sorry for the pain you and your wife are experiencing and will be praying for all of you.

dominick · « **Reply #26 on:** December 10, 2010, 01:54:53 AM »

Douglas, I'm very sorry to hear of your situation. Dom

Zulu · « **Reply #27 on:** December 10, 2010, 02:59:03 AM »

Douglas,
You are in my thoughts. Both my parents and my wife's parents are alive and in their 80's. I dread the day.
Zulu

RocklockI · « **Reply #28 on:** December 10, 2010, 05:03:40 AM »

Sorry to hear the news Doug . You are correct quit smoking .

Gary

Artilleryman · « **Reply #29 on:** December 10, 2010, 05:57:38 AM »

Our thoughts and prayers for you and your family.