well it is confession time-AGAIN.
lord impressed on me how little respect i have for him.
well it is my bent to question him as i was thinking i was doing, at least, pretty good.
he showed me how, in my words, actions and thoughts-really in my heart-i go my own way. counting on him to understand, protect, prosper and forgive. and he does that in spite of how i treat him.
boys i'm tellin ya how much i'm hurting right now just thinking what a price he paid, what he endures from us.
i'm pretty sure i can not, ever, feel the pain he endures and keeps on keeping on to redirect me.
greed is a subject that has been directed in my mind over and over this week. all the programs on khcb this week have been directed in this direction and i feel they were aimed at me. thought i was pretty good here-well i aint. i can see how all my pleasures are greed. they numb the feelings, ease the pain if ya will, an allow me to "feel" good for such a short time. they actually take my time away from his taking care of me.
forgiveness is not the question-been done- it is respecting him that is the bottom line.
this is going to take some giving in for me, an i doan do that easily.
sorry to bother you with this--but maybe there is someone else that can gain from this. i'm praying so.
blessings
