joke....we could use a few.
Ever'body knowed ol Jim was the best squirrel hunter in town. Always came back with his limit. But one day his neighbor spied him comin and goin and saw that Jim didn't take no gun at all. So at the factory on Monday he's talking at coffee break and tells the boys: "I'm sure. He didn't have a gun, not one in the truck. Nowheres. But he come back with a full limit a squirrels."
"Well," says one fellow, "he's working this shift, let's ask him."
At lunch they're all crowded 'round and they put the question to Jim.
Ol Jim hung his head and scuffed his toe and turned red and says "Well, it's true boys, I don't take no gun."
Silence.
Finally someone says "Well then, Jim, how'daya kill all them squirrels?"
Jim says: "I ugly em to death. I'm so danged ugly I just stare at em, and when one o them squirrels takes a look at my face, he falls over dead. Better'n a Ten Gauge."
Silence again.
Finally someone smart says "Well dang, Jim, if that's all there is to it, why don't you take your mother in law along?"
"Naw," Jim says, "Tried that. She tore up the meat too bad."