I suppose most here have heard or read the letter received by the secy of agriculture about the 'not raising hogs' program, but in case you haven't here it is;
Honorable Secretary of Agriculture
Washington D.C.
Dear Sir:
My friend,Ed, over at Wells Iowa, received a check for $1000 from the
government for not raising hogs. So, I was wondering if i could get
into the "not raising hog" business next year.
What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind of
farm not to raise hogs on and what is the best breed of hogs not to
raise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keeping
with all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise
Raserbacks but if that is not a good breed not to raise then I will
just as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs.
As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping an
accurate inventory of how many hogs I have not raised. My friend,Ed,
is very joyful about the future of this business. He has been
raising hogs for 20 years and the best he ever made on them was $422
in 1968, until this year when he got your check for $1000 for not
raising hogs.
If I get $1000 for not raising 50 hogs will I get $2000 for not
raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small scale at first,
holding myself down to about 4000 hogs not raised which will mean
about $80,000 the first year.
Now, another thing. These hogs I will not raise will not eat
1,000,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers
for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not
raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4,000 hogs I am not going to
raise?
Also I am considering the "not milking cows" business so please send
me any information you have on that, too.
In view of these circumstances you understand that I will be totally
unemployed and plan to file for unemployment and food stamps. You can
be sure you will have my vote in the coming election.
Patriotically Yours; ... Orville Freeloader
P.S. Would you please notify me when you plan to distribute more free cheese?
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SO, THE FOLLOWING SIMILARITIES TO TODAY WERE MOST INTERESTING:
Today we have a combat situation going on in Libya;
Our president says we are NOT at WAR...
Suggestions have been floated about arming the 'freedom fighters'...
When asked, the admiral in charge says there are "flickers" of Al Queda among the 'freedom fighters'..
When inquiry was made of Hillary about this...she said they could be Al Queda terrorists..but she's not sure...
The administration's ambassador to the UN says "UN resolution 1793 doesn't prevent us from arming Al Queda terrorists".
So, Mr Secy of Defense..I would like to know;
How many ships are not involved in this war we are not fighting ?
How many non-missles have not been fired at the non-enemy ?
What kind of non-missles ? I would rather not fire sidewinders in this war we are not fighting, because they are cheaper.
If we were not to fire Tomahawk/cruise missles at this non enemy in this war we are not fighting..that would be very costly.
What type planes are not being used in this war we are not fighting ?
If I had a choice as to what kind of aircraft we would not use in this war we are not fighting, I would rather we not use F18s since they are less endangered by the enemy guns which are not firing at them..
If we were not to use helicopters, I think they would be more vunerable to the shoulder fired missles which are not being firied at them by the enemy who is not there..
I know you have already said you will not use ground troops in this war we are not fighting..because we do not know just how many troops and reinforcements and weapons the enemy who is not fighting us does not have..
Regards..an old not veteran; ... Emery Snafu
PS; Please tell me when you plan on not fighting another war ...so I can warn my friends who are not in the military..
