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Author Topic: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!  (Read 1432 times)

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Offline Smokin Joe

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OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« on: August 17, 2012, 01:14:27 PM »
A little off topic.........as you may know, it's been hotter than the gates of Hell out here on the Left Coast, so my cousin and I took off early to get in a little .45-90 and .50-70 Handi plinking.
 We went up into the foothills and found a bare patch of land so we wouldn't be accused of starting grass fires, and raised a little heck  ;D .
 I took my new Nikon rangefinder to test it out and it worked perfectly..........until we were about to take off for home.

 It was about 104 degrees so we jumped in the truck and turned the A/C on full. As one last test, I used the rangefinder to check the distance to a couple of cattle that wandered by. They looked to be about 160 yards out, but the rangefinder displayed "1"
 I tried it again on a junk car body at about 200 yards out and it said "1".
I was getting a little pissed after having spent 360 bucks on a piece of crap........I looked over at my Cousin who was blowing snot trying not to belly-laugh.........I asked "what the hell is wrong with you?"

He replied.........."roll down the windows, Dumb Ass!"  :o :o :o
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Offline quickdtoo

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2012, 01:16:59 PM »
 :o ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D Been there, done something similar, but I won't elaborate!!  :-[

Tim
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Offline Jason F

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2012, 01:18:24 PM »
Here's your sign ;D ;D ;D
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Offline kynardsj

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2012, 01:43:29 PM »
I truly believe all of us have at one time or another done something that made us call ourselves a dumb ass. Some won't admit it but I will say now that there have been a few times in my life that if I had a rubber leg I would have kicked my own ass. Just live and learn and try not to do it again is the best we can do.
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Offline petemi

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2012, 01:48:58 PM »
I love it.  It'll put me to bed tonight with a chuckle ;D   Ya can't live as long as a lot of us here without doing a few notable things that an old Florida Cracker friend of mine would say were "Et up with the Yankee dumbass"......guilty as charged.

Pete
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Offline AtlLaw

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2012, 02:06:11 PM »
Quote from: kynardsj on August 17, 2012, 01:43:29 PM
all of us have at one time or another done something that made us call ourselves a dumb ass.
Hummmmmm,  :-\   Nope, can't say as I ever did...   8)
 ;D
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Offline LaDano

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2012, 05:19:37 PM »
I can definitely relate. Seems like its on a daily basis the older I get though. Hehehe.
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Offline blind ear

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2012, 06:36:31 PM »
da-ja-vu    I have only had 2 this week - - - so far.  (man I'm glan no one saw that)   ear
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Offline hoytcanon

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #8 on: August 18, 2012, 02:35:11 AM »
A few years back I tried to get under the hood of my truck... the friggin' catch was jammed solid, I worked at it for 20 minutes but could not get it to budge... so I drove to the local, "small-town" garage, rolled down the window and said "Hey Pete, I can't get the hood open, it's stuck!" Pete walks over and says... "I'll give it a try...ok pull the release." I immediately turned beet red... pulled the release and watched the hood pop open... I quickly said, it must have rattled loose on the drive over and got out of there fast! I had had a total "brain fart" and forgotten to pull the hood release... like ya' say... dumbazz!
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Offline Couger

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #9 on: August 18, 2012, 07:30:58 AM »
 
yeah ok, But did the range finder work?  And how well!!??  8)
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Offline bikerbeans

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #10 on: August 18, 2012, 07:48:17 AM »
Kinda reminds me of a good friend of mine when his uncle took him rabbit huntin' the first time.  Uncle told him to always make sure to roll the window down before shootin' the bunny. ;D
 
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Offline ibgp3

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #11 on: August 18, 2012, 08:14:07 AM »
My brother did that with a big bore.
...not only blew out the window, popped the windshield loose too.
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Offline Goatwhiskers

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #12 on: August 18, 2012, 09:13:28 AM »
I once knew cop in a town in Texas which we shall not name.  He was riding shotgun, 'twas a cold night, he went to unload a large load of Beechnut juice---roll the window down, dumazz  Goat
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Offline SEK_22Hornet

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #13 on: August 18, 2012, 05:49:29 PM »
Kinda like the old joke about the guy who had a neighbor who had a contractor doing some work for him, so he thought he'd get a quote form the contractor for some work he wanted done while the guy was in the neighborhood - the contractor came in to talk to the guy and the guy told him what he wanted done - the contractor took out a pad and wrote it down then went to the window - looked out, opened the window and yelled "green side up".  They went to the next room and the guy told the contractor what he wanted done - the contractor wrote it down, went to the window, opened it and yelled "Green Side up".  Third room the same thing - so the guy finally asked the contractor what that meant - he said, oh, I have a couple dumbasses laying sod next door.....
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Offline blind ear

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #14 on: August 19, 2012, 12:27:52 PM »
Quote from: Couger on August 18, 2012, 07:30:58 AM

yeah ok, But did the range finder work?  And how well!!??  8)
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Excellent!     :o      ear
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Oath Keepers: start local
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“It is no coincidence that the century of total war coincided with the century of central banking.” – Ron Paul, End the Fed
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An economic crash like the one of the 1920s is the only thing that will get the US off of the road to Socialism that we are on and give our children a chance at a future with freedom and possibility of economic success.
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everyone hears but very few see. (I can't see either, I'm not on the corporate board making rules that sound exactly the opposite of what they mean, plus loopholes) ear
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Offline BBF

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #15 on: August 20, 2012, 06:02:03 AM »
I darn near started to monkey wrench a Honda motorcycle engine apart because it refused to start. Then  by a miracle I happen to look at the kill switch on the handle bar.
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Offline Sourdough

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #16 on: August 20, 2012, 06:59:18 AM »
Oh I got a good one, hate to admit it, but's it's too funny not to.
 
Back right after my divorce, I was in pretty bad shape.  Went to the barn and fed my horses, then saddled Charro and went to a bar across and up the road every evening and got drunk.  Luckily my horse knew how to get me to the barn.  I woke up one saturday morning lying in the stall.  I got up and went to the 10 ft gate, started shoving on the end of the gate.  That gate would just not move.  I climbed over the gate and tried pulling from the outside.  No good, gate would not move.  Charro, my horse came to the gate and watched me.  After I had climbed over the gate and still unable to open it, Charro went to the other end of the gate and pushed it open with his nose.  I had been pushing the wrong end.  Charro then pushed me to the tack room so I could remove his saddle.  At least the horse was smart enough to know what I needed to do.  He took care of me, till I got my life straightened out.  I was a real dummy back then.
 
Oh and the kill switch, been there done that too with a 4-wheeler.  Got out the meter, checked the battery, was ready to take the ignition switch apart when the 6yr old said, "Daddy you need to push the red switch to where it says on".  We all need to be humbled now and then.  But by a 6 year old, and a horse?
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Offline BBF

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Re: OK, I'm a Dumb Ass!
« Reply #17 on: August 20, 2012, 07:50:55 AM »
By a horse or kid!!  Nope, haven't been that low......................... or blessed !! ;D ;D
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