Author Topic: Colorful Language (Read 12788 times)

DWARREN123 · « **Reply #30 on:** February 11, 2005, 04:58:58 PM »

When someone has gained weight or is overweight or pregnant:

Swelled up like a snake bit pup.

jbeckley · « **Reply #31 on:** March 03, 2005, 12:16:53 PM »

Someone has already posted finer than frog's hair, but how about finer than frog's hair split three ways!
Just before I went into the Army in 78, I was at our local shooting range busting some caps on a .357 Revolver I owned at the time, There was an older gentleman inquiring about my pistol, so I let him take a look at it, he cocked the hammer and then tried to move the cylinder with his thumb and forefinger and he replied "That's tighter than a bulls a-- in fly time!

willysjeep134 · « **Reply #32 on:** November 16, 2005, 11:04:46 AM »

"What in the Sam Hill" - Used when in polite company to replace a cuss word.

Legend has it that the Calumet and Hecla mining company of Calumet, Michigan in the 1850's had a mine captain named Sam Hill. He was a rusticated man, prone to profanity. Unfortunately, because he was a mine captain he had to correspond with higher-ups in the company headquarters. A lot of these higher-ups were easterners, not used to swearing. Well, either he had to dictate his letters or had somebody proof-read them, but in any event somebody inserted "sam hill" in place of the profane words he used, so as not to offend the executives. Sam was fond of dropping the "F-bomb" as we called it in highschool, and other cuss words. To quote a movie "He worked in profanity like some artists might work in oils or clay".

There's also the expression around here "Let the tail go with the hide" which basically means, you get the extra for free. Say, for instance, you go to buy some feed. The guy at the co-op gives you a bag weighing 52 pounds, because he didn't want to keep just a few pounds of something around, but you only wanted fifty pounds, so he might say "well, let the tail go with the hide then".

rockbilly · « **Reply #33 on:** March 19, 2006, 03:54:25 PM »

My grandmother used "Why, bless their heart." quite often. I never thought much about it untill years later. Sometime she said it meaning what she said, but other times, it was a nice way to justify saying something about someone else. "Why, that Judy Jones ain't got the sence god give a bed bug, bless her heart." "Her daughter is ugly as a mud fence, blewss her heart." "Her ole man will steal the gold outta your teeth, but he does half-way support his family, bless his heart."

You get the picture don't you? Bless your heart...... :wink:

Dee · « **Reply #34 on:** December 29, 2006, 02:44:09 PM »

Quote from: Daveinthebush on March 17, 2004, 05:22:41 PM

I hear a lot of people using the word Nimrod as a negative. But according to the Bible; "And Cush begat Nimrod: he began to be a mighty one in the earth. He was a mighty hunter before the LORD: wherefore it is said, Even as Nimrod the mighty hunter before the LORD." (Genesis 10:8-9).

How many of us here want to be might hunters. :roll:

The reason Nimrod is used as a negative, was while true he was a mighty hunter, he was a pagan. His focus was on the world, not God.

One of my own is; Some dogs ya gotta feed thru the fence. In other words if you try to help the guy he'll resent it.

Another of my own is; You can put a collar on a coyote, but ya better not put him in charge of watchin the chickens. In other words regardless of what he says he is, see him for what he really is.

It's been so long since it rained, the frogs don't know how to swim.

He's goofier than a stomped ant.

His elevator goes up, but the doors won't open.

I ain't saying the guys' queer, but the way he acts, he's missin a good chance to be. Refering to a sissy.

His mouth is ten minutes ahead of his brain.

It's so hot, I saw a coyote chasing a rabbit, and they were both walkin.

If ya don't like this gear, ya shore ain't gonna like the next one. In other words, get off my back.

Skunk · « **Reply #35 on:** February 26, 2007, 01:21:18 PM »

I just had to add these:

"That fella is more nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."

"Stop talking like your lips don't match."

"Stinks so bad, it would knock a buzzard off a Sh** wagon."

"She is so ugly, she looks like she chased a fart through a bag of nails."

oso45-70 · « **Reply #36 on:** March 10, 2007, 04:26:37 PM »

Skunk

I liked to have busted a gut on that one, Great.......Joe.......

Quote from: Skunk on February 26, 2007, 01:21:18 PM

I just had to add these:

"That fella is more nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."

"Stop talking like your lips don't match."

"Stinks so bad, it would knock a buzzard off a Sh** wagon."

"She is so ugly, she looks like she chased a fart through a bag of nails."

Dee · « **Reply #37 on:** March 11, 2007, 03:43:25 AM »

Some dogs have to be fed thru the fence. Refering to hard headed people.

That would puke a hound on a gut wagon.

He's a half a bubble off plumb.

When ya find yourself in a hole. Stop diggin!

She's uglier than home-maid soap.

If you don't give nothin, you don't get nothin.

WolfBrother · « **Reply #38 on:** May 17, 2007, 06:17:14 AM »

He squats with spurs on - some one not to bright.

Brett · « **Reply #39 on:** May 25, 2007, 03:23:58 PM »

She fell from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

It's colder than a witches tit tie in a brass brassier.

He's as sharp as a bag full of marbles or he's as dumb as a bag of rocks.

thickstrings · « **Reply #40 on:** December 23, 2008, 05:39:25 PM »

When I asked if another fella was gonna come ane cut my hay , my neighbor replied: "His mouth ain't no prayer book"....... When I asked a fella who I was working with if the part I wrenched on was good enough, he said: " It's tighter than dicks hat band"....... and Then there's allways, He don't have both oars in the water"....... or "He's a few fries short of a happy meal"..." The elevator don't go to the top"...."A winks as good as a nod to a blind horse" OR as I remember from my days in Chicago," He don't know so good"...........

billy_56081 · « **Reply #41 on:** December 24, 2008, 01:51:10 AM »

I like the term "Old maids" that is used for the unpopped kernels of popcorn. When I was kid I didn't quite catch the meaning of it.

mrbigtexan · « **Reply #42 on:** January 05, 2009, 04:06:55 PM »

that dog will hunt- meaning it is a good idea

mrbigtexan · « **Reply #43 on:** February 07, 2009, 05:14:41 PM »

another one is when it hasn't rained in a while- it's drier than a popcorn fart.

AlaninNM · « **Reply #44 on:** May 02, 2009, 03:11:16 PM »

My fav

He's so dumb he couldn't dump sh*t out of a boot if the instructions were written on the bottom

Pumah25 · « **Reply #45 on:** May 20, 2009, 07:07:27 AM »

He's nuttier than squirrel poop.
He's about as sharp as a bag of wet mice.
He rows real hard but ain't got an oar in the water. (Efforts there but no brains to help his cause)

billy_56081 · « **Reply #46 on:** May 20, 2009, 01:09:08 PM »

As my buddy Buckwheat is fond of saying, "drunker than six indians". Now that my friends is drunk!

Hodr · « **Reply #47 on:** May 20, 2009, 05:32:41 PM »

Wind blew away everything except the second mortgage and the last strand of barbed wire fence
It's all uphill in both directions
Bread upon the waters always comes back increased
A hand out makes a bum, a hand up makes a new friend
Help can"t be paid for, only passed on to those in need
Only a thief wears a mask (My father leading a vigilance comittee in toally rural california 1952)
When I was six a car pulled up out front and 4 guys started beating a guy they pulled out of the back seat with hammers. Dad went out to stop them and took a couple of licks. Mom spoke a different language. She locked into the doorframe with Dad's 94 Winchester. By the third shot they were leaving as fast as that chevy would run. Dad called the county sheriff and got the guy bandaged up. Sheriff asked Dad whether mom had tried to hit them or scare them. Mom spoke up and said only " House rule, you kill it, you gotta clean and skin it"
blindhari
PS Mom was all Irish

Rex in OTZ · « **Reply #48 on:** May 22, 2009, 10:20:07 AM »

Boy's Thats a swinging gate outfit!. folks took the time to properly do things as properly construct a well braced gate post and hung the gate as opposed to wireing the end to a post and dragging the damn thing

Boy's Thats a slack wire outfit!. My Dad saidthey dont maintain anything and the wire fences are in poor sagging condition with rotted off posts.

FFA........... Father Farms Alone. Dad said of a kid off ta town instead of helping out at home.

Does to tell! A uneque saying my dad uses kinda droll statement of the obviouse.

Dont know yer ass form a hole in the ground.

Donk know if yer ass was punched or drilled?? classic Dad, never heard it any place else, his version of you dont know crap.

Kids and dogs dont work either one they go to hell on you! My Dad again.

He's a brick shy of a load. Yer nuts!

He's one slick goat Roper! a compliment "takes skill to rope a goat"

She fills out that dress like 6 pounds of crap in a 2 pound bag! (from a movie)

Them red stripper heels make her stand out like a side of beef! (same movie as above)

She's running with a tight sinch, ...............fast stepping pregnant Gal in reference to a "easy" un-wed expecting mother this would have been a scandle 30 years ago and gossip of the township.

Rex in OTZ · « **Reply #49 on:** May 22, 2009, 10:32:44 AM »

The only ranch in the country wher yure up to yer ass in mud and has blow sand in yer face!!

Sandhills term.

Thats a hell a ranch they mostly raise Yucca, prickly pear and rattlers! Grubbed off range from poor management running too much stock on a piece of ground.

He's a hell of a side hiller! A dubiouse compliment useing your mower tractor on a slope harvesting prairie hay out of Duck slew's a desprate act, useally from poor management.

Happyness is a full stack yard. getting hay moved off the meddows before winter

Did ya fart or crap yerself. reference to farting in the truck cab.

SHOOTALL · « **Reply #50 on:** May 22, 2009, 10:34:46 AM »

Grinning like a mule eating briars !

charles p · « **Reply #51 on:** November 18, 2009, 07:11:19 AM »

Can't make a silk purse from a sow's ear

Even a blind hog can find an acorn now and then

SHOOTALL · « **Reply #52 on:** November 18, 2009, 07:22:30 AM »

He hit it so hard it made staples squeel for 20 post in either direction .

Duke0313 · « **Reply #53 on:** November 18, 2009, 08:32:03 PM »

"You don't know S#!T from Applebeans!"...I've had applebeans and it really is hard to tell the diiference betwixt'em.

charles p · « **Reply #54 on:** November 19, 2009, 04:24:43 PM »

So black that a piece of coal will make a white mark on it.

m-g Willy · « **Reply #55 on:** March 15, 2010, 02:21:40 PM »

So cold it freeze the balls off a brass monkey.- (nothing to do with an ape)
Nervous as a pregnant nun.= really nervous!
Nigger rich=ain't got much but ya got enough to be happy for awhile!

Scibaer · « **Reply #56 on:** April 05, 2010, 04:01:25 AM »

my neigbhor told me this one , just the other day.
"shiny as a niggers heal "

kid buckskin · « **Reply #57 on:** June 03, 2010, 03:12:24 PM »

my mom was always sayin O chicken dukeey

maddogg · « **Reply #58 on:** June 03, 2010, 03:47:38 PM »

When someone asks you a question to which the answer is obvious.
Is a pig's a$$ pork?
Is a frog's a$$ waterproof?

A few from my Dad:

Talking stupid~~ You talk like a man with a paper a$$ hole.
Being useless ~~ As useful as t1ts on a road grader.

My friend from the Navy when he was frightened or scared,
Do farts have lumps?

Spirithawk · « **Reply #59 on:** July 04, 2010, 02:21:53 PM »

Just a few;

Not quite there but almost plumb

As sweet as a Georgia Peach

Crookeder than a dog's hind leg

More fun than a barrel full of mankeys

As inocent as a lamb

When my granny got agravated with me...You'd make an iron man rust!

Up s**t creek without a paddle.

Uglier that the south end of a north bound duck

Finer than frog hair. ( meaning something good )

More stubborn than a Missouri Mule

Like trying to find teeth on a chicken - refering to something impossible