Author Topic: So there I was....  (Read 1041 times)

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Offline SAWgunner

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So there I was....
« on: February 18, 2005, 03:05:48 PM »
About 5 months into my year in Korea, I was NCOIC of our section and we had but one latrine.  Well, when we came back from lunch, everyone knew it was 'Ol Sarge's turn in the room of fury.  So there I was...finished with my business, and no toilet paper.  I was scrambling around searching frantically for anything that resembled paper.  Aha!!!  I found some computer screen wipes (come in a box like Kleenexs) and took care of business.  I was walking down the hill to the SCIF, and my rear-end was as raw as hamburger.  MAN!!!!  This is uncomfortable.  A female NCO that I was good friends with asked me was wrong (she noticed I was waddling).  I said, "If you have to know, I wiped with something that put a hurtin' on me".  She laughed and walked away.  After the briefing to the ROK Colonel, I went up and read the box and this is what interested me.  "Removes all body oils from glass surfaces".  Anyway, after that, the First Sergeant always made me take a roll with me to work.  heh heh


SAW
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Offline JPSaxMan

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So there I was....
« Reply #1 on: February 18, 2005, 03:43:45 PM »
Ouch. Boy, that musta been very uncomfortable. And I thought wiping with leaves was bad :)  :-D .  :D
JP

Attorney: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in
his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Doctor: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

Offline chuckles

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So there I was....
« Reply #2 on: February 18, 2005, 04:47:48 PM »
Baby wipes at the PX just for such emergencies. :D  :-D

Offline powderman

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So there I was....
« Reply #3 on: February 18, 2005, 04:57:28 PM »
Quote from: Fishman029
Ouch. Boy, that musta been very uncomfortable. And I thought wiping with leaves was bad :)  :-D .  :D


You can never get all the leaves off your butt, and they then ride around in your pants til ya get home.  :?  :?  :?  :?  :cry:  :cry:  :cry:  :cry: POWDERMAN.  :grin:  :grin:
Mr. Charles Glenn “Charlie” Nelson, age 73, of Payneville, KY passed away Thursday, October 14, 2021 at his residence. RIP Charlie, we'll will all miss you. GB

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Offline JPSaxMan

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So there I was....
« Reply #4 on: February 18, 2005, 05:13:56 PM »
Actually, the only time I used leaves was at boy scout camp, and it was a big, green leaf. Resembled the leaf of the rhubarb plant, but it was just a woodland weed. It had rained that day so it was wet. It wasn't TP, but I guess it really wasn't that bad. Imagine if it had been poison ivy? :eek: Let's not go there...:D
JP

Attorney: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in
his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Doctor: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

Offline SAWgunner

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So there I was....
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2005, 05:42:40 AM »
Yes sir, I believe that is about the most chaffed I have ever been down there.
Nosce Hostem
"Birds of Prey" 743rd MI BN
Proud Freemason-Chugwater Lodge No. 23

Offline jh45gun

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So there I was....
« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2005, 05:19:25 PM »
Did ya ever hear the old joke about the 2 guys out hunting and one had to go so he said I gotta go but I did not bring any paper with me. The other guy said well neither did I just go in the woods and use some leaves. The guy in the woods said hey I cannot find any? The other guy hollered back well use a dollar! The other guy come back a mess and the guy who was with him said what happened? The guy in the woods said I did what you said but I only had 3 quarters, 2 dimes and a nickle.  :eek:
Said I never had much use for one, never said I didn't know how to use it.

Offline JPSaxMan

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« Reply #7 on: February 19, 2005, 05:21:59 PM »
*Cringes* No comment *Cringes again*  :)  :-D  :)  :-D  :D
JP

Attorney: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in
his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Doctor: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

Offline big medicine

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So there I was....
« Reply #8 on: February 19, 2005, 05:42:22 PM »
When I got married my wife asked why all my GI t-shirts were sleeve less and many were 1/2 t-shirts. I had to explain that the little squares of TP that comes in the MREs just wasnt enough :shock:

Offline jh45gun

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« Reply #9 on: February 19, 2005, 05:48:06 PM »
Quote from: big medicine
When I got married my wife asked why all my GI t-shirts were sleeve less and many were 1/2 t-shirts. I had to explain that the little squares of TP that comes in the MREs just wasnt enough :shock:


O____________K  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)
Said I never had much use for one, never said I didn't know how to use it.

Offline Hooker

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So there I was....
« Reply #10 on: February 20, 2005, 06:57:14 AM »
Thats's pretty rough , but give this a try Temp low 20s 16'' of snow no TP
Bright idea use a snowball  :shock: I use to have hemoroids now I have protruding adams apple  :wink:

Pat
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Offline Bigdog57

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So there I was....
« Reply #11 on: February 24, 2005, 05:18:46 AM »
Most folks don't realize, when a US Navy ship is overseas for any time, they end up getting restocked with supplies acquired locally.  When we were in the IO, we ran out of the good ol' American two-ply soft TP.  We got in some junk made in CHINA!  Man, that stuff hurt.  It was like using those brown paper towels - just not soft at all!
The Senior Chief got to wondering why we were suddenly going thru so many boxes of the white "kim-wipes" towels.   :?
Had to be real careful flushing them . . .  :twisted:

You don't wanna know about the milk . . .  :shock:

Offline SAWgunner

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So there I was....
« Reply #12 on: February 24, 2005, 06:33:58 AM »
Like they say, "John Wayne Paper, Tougher'n hell, and don't take crap off no-one."  Heh heh.


SAW
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Proud Freemason-Chugwater Lodge No. 23

Offline tbull55

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So there I was....
« Reply #13 on: March 07, 2005, 08:44:02 AM »
I gotta say, stick with the baby wipes.  They saved my life on a three day camping trip in the Mountains.

Tbull55
Duct Tape is like the force!
It has a light side.
It has a dark side.
And it holds the universe together!
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Offline mjbgalt

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So there I was....
« Reply #14 on: March 08, 2005, 11:15:45 AM »
or the time i went on a boy scout camping trip and took a hike, dug a hole, did my "thing" and dumped dirt back on top.

about two hours later a groups of scouts came by and were laughing and carrying on...


apparently they were on a scavenger hunt and one of the items needed was a piece of white paper...


they were out hiking and one of them found this piece of white paper sticking out of the ground....and pulled on it.... :)  :)  :)  :)  :)  :)

-Matt
I have it on good authority that the telepromter is writing a stern letter.

Offline Mikey

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So there I was....
« Reply #15 on: March 08, 2005, 11:41:59 AM »
SAWgunner - ya probably would have gotten off easier if you had used Kimchi (LOLOLOL)............... Mikey.