The reason you haven't seen any crows is they have all relocated to urban Terre Haute for the winter. It's normally warmer by several degrees than a rural tree branch. It's also safer due to municipal codes restricting the discharge of firearms within city limits. And, of course, these flying pests are protected by State law, as well as those who feel cows, and other "sentient beings" should join us at the dinner table as guests, not the main course.
So, these large black scavengers are free to multiply, destroy property, and spread histoplasmosis, and other filthy diseases at will.
I suppose when crows develop a taste for stray pets, and small children, some form of non-lethal action will be conducted to appease public outrage. But this will, of course, provide only a temporary solution to a permanent problem due to misplaced, and misguided sentiment.
I realize your post was intended to be humorous, but when I endured my latest CT scan (I'm severely asthmatic.) my pulmonologist informed me that I had become infected with histoplasmosis, which, he added, was becoming quite common in my area.
Thank you PETA, for your imaginative, and diligent effort to brainwash our impressionable youth to accept all forms of life as equal partners. :roll: