Miked,
The fact that it's a custom barrel may be the cause of your problems. If the rear of the chamber is oversized it would let the case head expand excessivly which would loosen your primer pockets, without showing any other pressure signs. Measure the belt before and after firing to see if your getting excessive head expansion. The only causes of this are excessive pressure, or a belled or oversized chamber. Anything over .001 expansion at the belt is to much. When the primers fall out the casehead has to be expanding to much, you just need to find the cause. I wouldn't rule out an overload even at 3 grains under the book. There are other factors that can boost pressure quickly, tight bore, short throat, tight neck, short chamber neck are a few. A chamber cast might be of some help to find or eliminate causes.